Psalm 139: Struggling with Anger

READING THE BOOK OF PSALMS

PART LXXIX

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Psalm 139

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We’re all bastards, but God loves us anyway.

—Will Campbell (1924-2013)

Psalm 139 gives me theological whiplash.  It opens with pious introspection and praise of God.  Then the text expresses hatred for the wicked and those who hate God.  The psalmist wishes that God would “slay the wicked.”  Then Psalm 139 concludes with a pious prayer for divine guidance.

In my adopted tradition, the following prayer occurs early in the Holy Eucharist, Rite II:

Almighty God, to you all hearts are open, all desires known, and no secrets are hid:  Cleanse the thoughts of our hearts by the inspiration of your Holy Spirit, that we may perfectly love you, and worthily magnify your holy Name; through Jesus Christ our Lord.  Amen.

—The Book of Common Prayer (1979), 355

Wickedness is the rejection of divine generosity.  Therefore, the wicked cannot be generous.  They are greedy.  When the wicked give, they do so in a stingy manner.  They imagine that they mut rely on their own strength, resources, and devices.  These are the people whom the psalmist wishes God would slay.  These are the people the psalmist hates.

Examine me, O God, and know my mind;

probe me and know my thoughts.

See if I have vexatious ways,

and guide me in ways everlasting.

–Psalm 139:23-24, TANAKH:  The Holy Scriptures

One may imagine that God considers such hatred “vexatious.”

Nevertheless, I understand such emotional outbursts and strong feelings.   I recall a painful period of my life more than a decade ago:  A man whom I did not know, by doing his job, as he believed was proper, pushed me to the edge of suicide.  I do not think warm and positive thoughts about him as I write this post.  I even think some profane titles for him.  I spare you those titles and leave them to hour imagination, O reader.  So, yes, I understand this psalm and others like it.  My foe may not have been wicked, but I care about the result more than the intention.

We mere mortals, in our limited knowledge, may inadvertently commit horrible deeds, thereby damaging other people.  Not all abuse is intentional.  So, by grace, may we avoid harming one another as much as possible.  And, when we feel hatred or animosity rising internally, may we take our darker feelings to God.  May we never permit these feelings to define or to overwhelm us.  We can never escape or hide from God, who loves us, knows us better than we know ourselves, and in whom we can become the best possible versions of ourselves.

KENNETH RANDOLPH TAYLOR

FEBRUARY 22, 2023 COMMON ERA

ASH WEDNESDAY

THE FEAST OF HANS SCHOLL, SOPHIE SCHOLL, AND CHRISTOPH PROBST, ANTI-NAZI MARTYRS AT MUNICH, GERMANY, 1943

THE FEAST OF SAINT MARGARET OF CORTONA, PENTIENT AND FOUNDER OF THE POOR ONES

THE FEAST OF CHARLES JOHN VINCENT, JR., ANGLICAN ORGANIST AND COMPOSER

THE FEAST OF GEORGE CLEMENT MARTIN, ANGLICAN ORGANIST AND COMPOSER

THE FEAST OF SAINT PRAETEXTATUS, ROMAN CATHOLIC BISHOP OF ROUEN

THE FEAST OF THOMAS BINNEY, ENGLISH CONGREGATIONALIST MINISTER, LITURGIST, AND “ARCHBISHOP OF NONCONFORMITY”

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